Is it just me or did the Super Bowl XLIV Commercials totally suck…. yet again? I swear it’s a case of trying to hard. These advertisers spend millions and millions on these ads…… and spend all year coming up with a great concept to top everyone…… and it shows. The ads are overworked, under-edited and just plain stupid.

Out of about 80 ads, there were only 11 that stood out to me this year! You can see them all in the Hulu Widget below. If for some reason the widget is not working go here to see them on Hulu.

1. Mark Sanchez CBS “Heart” Yes, I am biased since I heart him but you have no idea how awesome that commercial was on my bosses movie theater sized screen and mega-surround sound. By far my fave ad of the super bowl. The sexiest man in the NFL standing there saying “This is the sound of my heart beating. You are important to me… especially if you watch football.” I drool just thinking about it
2. Bud Light “T-Pain Voice Box” Remnicient of the old skool Bud Light “Wazzzup!” ads that were so awesome! This ad cracked us all up. Very well done!
3. Doritos “Playing Nice” Doritos took over the Super Bowl with their ads. I don’t even want to know how many bags they would need to sell to cover the cost for all their ads….. And for the most part, they weren’t that great. But “Playing Nice” was hysterical! It had a little kid laying down the law to his mom’s date.  “Don’t look at my mom. Don’t touch my Doritos”
4. Career Builder “Casual Fridays” There are no words for this….. A whole lot of ugly people in their underwear. It’s priceless.
5. Google Search On This was one of the best commercials I have ever seen. I thought it was extremely well done. Very simple, but very powerful.
6. ETrade Baby: “Girlfriend” The ETrade Baby can do no wrong in my world. All of his ads amuse me and this one was pretty freaking funny. Etrade baby gets a girlfriend who gets jealous of another girl. You thought Shankapotamus was funny? You gotta check out the “Milk-aholic”
7. Dodge Charger “Man’s Last Stand” Okay I was a bit disappointed when I found out it was a car commercial because the ad was seriously funny. But the more I thought about it, the more appropriate it seems. The guys in the ad are being voiced over with their thoughts—all the things they sacrifice while being in a committed relationship. But the one thing they won’t give up…..their car. Best line “I’ll watch your vampire tv shows with you”
8. Hyundai “Brett Favre” Gotta love when a player can be self deprecating and mocking himself! It’s 20 years in the future and Brett is still playing football at 59 and still not sure he is ready to retire!
9. Volkswagon Das Auto “Punch Buggy” Remember the old Punch Buggy game? Every time you see a Volkswagon Bug you punch someone in the arm and declare the color of the car you saw? Well, welcome to the 2010 version! With 13 Volkswagon models, Punch Buggy becomes a whole new game!
10. Budweiser Clydesdales: Calf Grows Up Baby ponies and calfs! How can you not love it! The pony and the cow are BFF growing up and then the Pony grows up to be a clydesdale and goes away. But when he returns to town, the cow remembers their friendship and they are reunited!
11. Tru TV “Punxsutawney Polamalu” Yes, this ad is beyond stupid. But I don’t care, I get the giggles like crazy every time I see it. Instead of pulling out a groundhog, the mayor pulls out a little Polamalu, complete with curly fro. Polamalu sees his shadow which means 6 more weeks of football on Tru TV!

There was a semi entertaining ad by Snickers that featured Betty White. Some are saying it’s going to be “the” commercial. But *shrug* it didn’t make my list!

The Super Bowl XLIV Commercial Awards:

Best Use of a Hot Guy In a PSA: Mark Sanchez Heart Commercial. Tim Tebow’s highly “controversial” and anticipated ad pretty much sucked. The hype was more exciting than the few second commercial. Mark’s commercial was so much better. I drooled a little.

Best use of tighty whities in an ad Career Builder “Casual Fridays”

Runner up is the Dockers, “I wear no pants” commercial. Which would have been funnier if it hadn’t aired right after the no pants Career Builder commercial. By then, the room was a little sick of seeing ugly men in no pants.

Best Anheiser Busch Commercial:

For Bud Light– T-Pain Voice Box.

For Budweiser Clydesdales “Calf Grows Up” Definitely a sweet commercial. I’m a sucker for the Clydesdale series of commercials!

Best Doritos Commercial “Playing Nice/House Rules”

Best “awwwwwwwwwww!” Commercial: Tie. Google “Search On” and Budweiser Clydesdales “Calf Grows Up”

Best Throwback Commercial Volkswagon Punch Buggy

Boost Mobile tried to win this with the “Super Bowl Shuffle” but I didn’t think it was funny. It kinda made me sleepy. The punch buggy, however, that was hysterical.

Best NFL Star Mocking Himself in a Super Bowl Ad Hyundai “Brett Favre”

Also nominated: Tru TV “Punxsutwaney Polamalu”

Biggest Letdown Commercial Cars.com “Timothy Richmond”

There were actually a lot of these ads. The ones that seemed so good, couldn’t wait to see what the product was….. and then they sucked.  Cars.com was definitely the worst. It was a loooooong ad and you kept thinking, I wonder where this is going……. and then….. it went.

Best Gratuitious use of Sex to Sell Something: Motorola Megan Fox in the Bathtub

Worst Gratuitious Use of Sex to Sell Something: Go Daddy! with Danika Patrick

What was your favorite Super Bowl XLIV Commercial? Leave me a comment below or shoot me a tweet @stilettosportsj and let me know!

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