Monday, March 25, 2019

With all these playoffs going on, I’ve had fans begging me to do my own picks. Okay so it was only two people so far but still! As I was doing my picks and doing all this extensive research and learning billions of random facts, I realized that all those sports stats just muddle things up! The more you read the more the facts contradict themselves. By the end I was more confused then when I started. So I decided to rely on my trusy old method used in many March Madness tournaments. And as I made my picks I realized how far my rules have advanced and figured I better put them down to share with everyone!

Stiletto Sports’ Rulebook for Team Selections aka “the picks” works especially well in playoff match ups.

Rule #1: If you already have a team you follow, pick them!

If not…

  • 1a: If your boyfriend/husband/signifcant other/family member/ friend has a team they really like and you don’t care at all, go with what they say
  • 1b. Go with your home town, home state, current state of residence or favorite state to vacation in.
  • Proving the Rules: I’ve watched Kansas college basketball for over 10 years. I always pick them in match-ups out of loyalty. And look, last year they won! Dad worships the Celtics and I don’t have an NBA team anymore so I went with his and look, they won last year! I live in Florida and didn’t care about baseball so I figured, hey, let’s root for the Tampa Bay Rays and look, they got to the World Series!

Rule #2: Pick the team with the hottest guys

This can be tricky! Feel free to ask me for my input

  • 2a. However, if a team from your hometown, home state, current state of residence, or favorite state to vacation is in a match-up and does not have a cute player, you may disregard Rule 2 to support your local team.
  • 2b. Sometimes both teams will have hot guys. Use your discretion. Does one super hot & talented star outweigh three cuties? Weigh this carefully!
  • 2c. If you have heard of a player, even if he is not hot, chances are he is probably good. Afterall, why else have you heard of him? You can pick his team even if he is ugly.
  • 2d: Amended 1/4/09. Use caution with 2a. Make sure you are very loyal to your state or town because you really shouldn’t go against the cute guys: See Dolphins losing to Ravens in NFL playoffs. I chose Dolphins because I live in Fl even though the Ravens had the hot guy. Bad plan.

Rule #3: Pick the team with the best colors

I personally love pink but you don’t see that very often. UNC does have a really pretty baby blue color. But usually Iother favorite or significant colors to help me choose like:

  • My high school & sorority colors: purple & gold
  • My college colors: blue & orange
  • Or I compare and contrast: if one team has red and black and the other has icky yellow and brown….

Rule #4: Judge a team by it’s name

This goes for state, town and mascot name. Like Phoebe from Friends when she said “Green Bay! That’s only, like, my favorite bay”

My favorite is when you get into college teams because there are some doozies out there! I’m actually going to steal my own quote from my NCAA basketball article:

Some strange and sometimes made-up names to consider

  • The Hawaii Rainbows. I’m sure that strikes fear into the hearts of their opponent
  • The Maryland Terrapins (aka turtles). They sound like they run up and down the court/field quickly
  • These leave you wondering what the heck it means. Ohio State Buckeyes???? Oklahoma Sooners? Sooner than what? Illinois Fighting Illini. Um, ok. Can’t even really say that. Ill-inny? Ill-eye-ni? Scary I’m sure.
  • And my favorite, the Southern Illinois Salukis. Which, after a painfully boring article about why on earth these people thought it would be a good name, I discovered is some ancient purebreed dog from Egypt.

Rule #5: Pick your favorite animal!

Hope it’s not the Saluki.

Which do you prefer: Cardinals or falcons? Eagles or ravens? Panthers or Jaguars? Bears or Tigers? Buck or Timberwolf? Ooooh or a Raptor! It gets trickier when the team doesn’t have animals. But just think about it: Do you like White Socks or Red Socks better 😉

Rule Test #2-5: This is how I pick my brackets for the NCAA March Madness Tournament. I won the pool the first year I did one and came in second another time. The boys were not amused.

Rule #6: Remember, it’s a girl’s prerogative to change her mind! (added January 20, 2009)

Don’t feel like have to be 100% committed to your pick! Thing of them more like a fabulous pair of shoes you found to go with a hot outfit! They might be absolutely perfect and you can totally go with them. But if you keep looking and find another pair that’s a better fit and goes better, that’s totally fine!

Sometimes you will go into a game not knowing all the info. You may know of a hottie on one team so you pick them. Half-way through the game, you may find the other team has more hotties. If this happens, remember the shoe thing and reweigh your options!

  • 6a. “you can totally change your pick mid-game if you discover hotties on the other team that you did not know about.” Just be prepared, not everyone approves of this rule. Or even knows about it. Refer them here if you have any problems exerting your rights!
  • Rule test: See Pittsburgh Steelers-Baltimore Ravens Team Selection and following Recap Article for proof of how well this method works!

More Rules to come as I Invent them!

*All Rules are subject to change without notice.

**Although it has great results for me, I in no way guarantee this method or recommend putting money down based on what I say. If you do and you lose, don’t blame me. If you win, gimme half! Or at least let me know it worked so I can have testimonials!

About the author: Jennifer Taglione is the owner of this fabulous website Stiletto Sports. Despite writing well over 500 posts, she still maintains that she is not a sports writer! She is however a huge fan of Kurt Warner, Larry Fitzgerald, Mark Sanchez, the Celtics, and totally kicks butt on March Madness brackets! Connect with her by following her on Twitter @StilettoSportsJ and subscribing to her weekly newsletter. For more info check out the About the Editor page!

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2 Responses

  1. lezzymom Said,

    I may just have to use this system next year in fantasy football. Clearly my system isn’t working.

    Posted on January 11th, 2009 at 9:45 am

  2. Stiletto Jen Said,

    We’ll have to see how it pans out this weekend but I’m thinking it’s a pretty good method!!

    Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 9:32 pm

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