Thursday, April 18, 2019

basketballgogglescopy-1Once a year, usually around the first week of March, this amazing phenomenon occurs. Some call it March Madness but to me, it’s so much more than that. It’s actually quite similar to what happens during those late, crazy hours at the bar when you are just so attracted to a member of the opposite sex that you take them home with you only to wake up the next morning with a splitting headache and a very ugly person next to you. People call this crazy phenomenon the case of  the “beer goggles” (or if it was really bad, a case of Lasik Eye Surgery).

See, every year during March Madness I look for the hottest guys on the team. Hey, look, if I’m going to watch 65 basketball games you better believe I want some eye candy, okay!  I have always had a thing for basketball boys, especially when they are on the court playing. And every March I find dozens of hot men to cheer for, only to wake up in April and go, um, “why on earth was I screaming my head off for Purdue? I don’t even like Purdue!”

During March Madness it seems that I pull out, what I like to call, my trusty “basketball goggles.”

I’ve had a bunch of requests for a piece on the hottest and sexiest college basketball players but kept putting it off  because unlike football players with their rock solid physiques or baseball with, well,  Derek Jeter, basketball players are usally really tall, lanky and often, very goofy looking—especially in college ball when these youngin’s are not fully developed.

See, the funny thing about some of these oh-so-hot-guys on-the-court is….well….I wouldn’t look twice at most of them if they were walking down the street by themselves or worked in an office. But throw them on a basketball court where I can watch them play and look out.

On the court they just possess this amazing skill and  precision. There is power and agility combined with their dedication and leadership. And if they can hit a three-point shot, or run the point and direct the court, well forget it, I’m half in love already. And off the court when they are rolling with the whole team to the bar or strutting around campus (shutup, I know I’m not actually in college anymore. I have a great memory though) it’s their attitude, their swagger that just has most women hooked.

My very long-winded babbling point is: do not judge a basketball player by his pictures. They often look so much better when they are playing on the court and you have your basketball goggles fully in place.  I’ll admit, some of the players I picked for my Super Sweet 16 look very odd in pics. But get them on the court and well, HOT DAMN!

I am giving you my list by Sweet 16 matchups, not necessarily in order of hotness. Athough by pure luck the first game is Purdue-UConn which puts Purdue as my first hottie and he is by far my favorite!



#1 Chris Kramer, guard


THIS is the reason I will wake up in April and say “why on earth was I cheering for Purdue?” There is no denying that this man is ridiculously hot. He definitely makes my hormones boil. Get it, Purdue Boilermakers….yeah okay lame.

Not only is he hot, but he is actually pretty good! A rare combo. In his freshmen year, he shattered Purdue’s record for steals in a season and in his sophomore season he was named the Big 10 Conference Defensive Player of the Year.

Personal Stats:

  • Full Name: Christopher Scott Kramer
  • 6’3, 207 pounds
  • 4/4/1988 (happy almost b’day!)
  • Academic Major: Organizational leadership and supervision. Currently a junior
  • Parents’ Names: Jon and Susan Kramer
  • Siblings: Has one brother, Matthew.




#2. Jeff Adrien, forward,


Power, strength and damn fine body. Yum!

Game Day Stats:

He averages 13.2 points, 10.2 rebounds and 1.6 assists per game. Leads the Big East Conference in double-doubles with 33 (as of last UConn team homepage update). He is the powerhouse behind UConn’s success and one of their leading scorers. He definitely brings it on the court!


  • 6’7, 243 pounds
  • Born February 10, 1986 in Naples, Fla.
  • Major: Liberal arts major, currently a senior.
  • Parents: mom, Linette Adrien
  • Siblings: Has a sister, Judith.

Connecticut Louisville Basketball




This is what I had to choose from:


I have to confess, these boys in blue didn’t do too much for me. Blue Blobs is an appropriate mascot……Okay that was mean. I’m going to go with

#3 Jason Love, forward/center


I’m not going to say he’s the McDreamy of basketball but his moves on the court are pretty sweet plus his last name is Love. Bonus points for that. Head Coach Sean Miller had a lot to say about his big man:

“Jason Love is one of the most responsible, hard-working, dedicated kids that I have ever coached. He improves by leaps and bounds every off season because of his approach to becoming the best he can be.” ~Xavier Official Athletics Website

Game Day Figures: averages 7.1 points, 5.9 rebounds per game.

  • 6’9, 255 pounds
  • Birthdate: 9/15/1987, Philadelphia, PA.
  • Major: undecided, currently a junior.
  • Family: father Wendell Love
  • ——————————————————–


#4 Jermaine Dixon, guard


He’s quick and has a raw, natural skill about him. Gotta love the little guy that can shoot from way out yet knows how to power to the basket. He’s a fierce competitor and is driven by his NBA playing brother to succeed.

Game Day Stats: average 9 points, 2.9 rebounds, 2.1 assists per game.

  • 6’3, 195 pounds
  • Birthdate: 4/15/1987, Baltimore, MD
  • Major: currently a junior. Went to junior college in Tallahassee, FL
  • Parents: Juanita Dixon and Robert Cooper
  • Siblings: Phil III, Juan, Nicole. You may know his brother Juan. He plays in the NBA for the  Detroit Pistons player and was part of the Maryland’s 2002 National Champion team.
  • Other: His aunt, Shelia Dixon is the current mayor of Baltimore.




#5 Leo Lyons, forward


In his junior year, Leo burst out and really began to shine. He was named to the Big 12 All-Improved Team after jumping from 7.4 ppg and 4.3 rpg in his sophomore year to averaging 13.1 points and 5.7 rebounds during his junior year. And that’s nothing! He hit the conference play section of the season and really began to shine. He ranked #10 in the Big 12 for both scoing and rebounding last year (conference play)

Game Days Stats: average 14.0 points, 6.2 rebounds, 2.0 assists per game

  • 6’9, 244 pounds
  • Birthdate: 5/25/1987 Kansas City, KS
  • Parent: Georgia Lyons
  • Family Man & Mama’s Boy: Loves spending time with his fam, talks to his mom before this games and his fave food is mom’s chicken with hot sauce.
  • Major: not sure but he is a senior and known to be a really talented muscian who writes and performs his own music and hopes to one day own a record label.



#6 Tyreke Evans, guard

If I didn’t worship Head Coach John Calipari and needed another reason to advance Memphis through my brackets, here he is:


This guy is sizzling. Not every college basketball player gets hot photo shoots like this one. Because, like I said, most are kinda goofy looking. But Tyreke has a drool worthy body and really impressive skills.

Game Day Stats: 16.6 points per game, 5.5 rebounds and 3.8 steals per game. He is the Tigers leading scorer and the go-to guy.

Oh and did I mention he is just a freshman?

He’s received the Freshman of the Year accolade from The Sporting News, and and USBWA (US Baketball Writer’s Association), which means he has won the consensus National Freshman of Year distinction.

Right now he is a finalist for National Player of The Year honors for both the 2008-09 Wooden Award and the Oscar Robertson Trophy–and is the only freshman in the finalists.

Personal Stats

  • 6’6, 219 pounds
  • Full Name: Tyreke Jamir Evans
  • Birthdate: 9/19/1989
  • Parents: John and Benita Evans
  • Major: undeclared, freshman




#7 Scottie Reynolds, guard


This former Big East Rookie of the Year has been an explosive and deadly force for ‘Nova. He can play both guard positions with a mastered skill that many hope to achieve. In other words, he can shoot the sweet three that I love so much, lead the floor and still manage to drive himself into the basket. There is nothing sexier than a little guy that can do all of that! Well, unless he has a brother that can do it too

Game Day Stats: averages 15.9 points, 3.9 rebounds, 2.6 assists per game and is the team’s second leading scorer. Was awarded the Most Outstanding Player of the Year award at the 2008 Villanova awards banquet.

  • 6’2, 190 pounds
  • Birthdate: 10/10/1987
  • Parents: Pam & Rick Reynolds
  • Siblings: as two brothers, Eric and Ross, and three sisters, Kelli Platt, Susie, and Daihilia




Forget Kyle Singler, Gerald Henderson and even Jon Scheyer. I want this guy:

#2 Greg Paulus, guard


He might not have the fame, stature and stats of his teammates but make no mistake, this little guy is one of the top three-point shooting threats in the country. He is ranked #12 in the ACC career record book–as in, of all time in the ACC…. you know, the super big name schools…. for three-point field goal percentage/attempts with 41.5 percent. And he is ranked #4 in the Duke career books too.

Plus, in the previos three seasons, he lead the team in assists. Okay so maybe he’s not having the best senior season but whatever. He is still hotter than the other guys!

Game Day Stats: 5.1 points, 1.4 rebounds and 1.3 assists

  • 6’1, 185 pounds
  • Full name: Gregory Russell Paulus
  • 7/3/1986, orginially from Syracuse
  • Parents:  Dave and Denise Paulus
  • Siblings:  Has four older brothers: David, Matt, Dan and Chris. Younger brother, Mike, and a younger sister, Sarah
  • Major: political science with a certificate in markets and management studies. Currently a senior.



Continue on to Part II

About the author: Jennifer Taglione is the owner of this fabulous website Stiletto Sports. Despite writing well over 500 posts, she still maintains that she is not a sports writer! She is however a huge fan of Kurt Warner, Larry Fitzgerald, Mark Sanchez, the Celtics, and totally kicks butt on March Madness brackets! Connect with her by following her on Twitter @StilettoSportsJ and subscribing to her weekly newsletter. For more info check out the About the Editor page!

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2 Responses

  1. Michelle Said,

    I LOVE Chris Kramer!!!!! Boiler UP!!! BTFU! I want to lick him!

    Posted on April 1st, 2010 at 8:23 am

  2. Stiletto Jen Said,

    hahaha I don’t know what BTFU but I hope its not what I thought it meant…..
    But I totally want to lick hi9m too!!! He is soooooooo…. YUM!

    Posted on April 3rd, 2010 at 2:47 pm

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